My name is Rebecca and I admit that I am powerless over anxiety.
My life has been ruled by it for as long as I can remember. It has negatively affected my relationships, my schooling, my job performance, and, without question, my health. There are times when I am paralyzed by it, unable to make decisions, be efficient or sometimes even to physically move. It can be a crippling dis-order, throwing all aspects of my life out of whack and into disarray. As I constantly remind myself, however, admitting that I am powerless is my first step toward recovery.
People who resist using the 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous to find sobriety often immediately reject the first step, “We admitted we were powerless over alcoholism and that our lives had become unmanageable.”
What do you mean “powerless?” I’m not weak or helpless! That’s ridiculous. I just need a stronger will power to overcome my addiction. Admitting powerlessness is like surrendering to defeat. How am I supposed to create a sober life with that attitude? To hell with being powerless!
Yea…I get that. Claiming to be powerless is intimidating…scary…humbling. It may even cause one to feel more vulnerable. I know because often I get anxious (but, of course!) when thinking that anxiety could possibly disrupt and screw up my life forever.
But being “powerless” for me doesn’t imply I’m weak or helpless. It doesn’t mean I’m dis-empowered either. Claiming powerlessness means I’m admitting that I cannot rely solely on myself. I’ve not surrendered to defeat. Nor am I leaving it up to my willpower to help me just “get over” being anxious. When I admit that I am powerless my focus shifts away from a narcissistic self-reliance. I am forced instead to reach out beyond myself for help.
Comfort and support often comes in the form of turning to my Higher Power for guidance and strength. Seeking help means remembering the relief I get when I actually take the herb that eases my stress. In claiming powerlessness, I am confessing I need to reach out to friends, maintain my spiritual disciplines and experience, once again, the peace and hope in living by the Serenity Prayer.
I am EMPOWERED by admitting I am powerless.
In surrendering, I gain FREEDOM.
So… what’s causing your life to be unmanageable? What behavior or addiction needs to be purged from your life? Are you addicted to alcohol, food, drugs, or shopping? Are you addicted to being needed? Is your life driven or controlled by a destructive emotion like mine is?
I challenge you today to admit you need help. Stop thinking you can do it on your own.
Be open to admitting you are powerless
and let that confession lead you
to a life of freedom, peace and joy.